


The Pulse Of A Rat

by madz13



Category: Bandom, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Alternate Universe - Crack, Crack, F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-16
Packaged: 2019-10-09 07:31:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17402654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madz13/pseuds/madz13
Summary: Just a small town girl sold for weed living her new life as the slave of her favorite band, Panic! At The Disco…but will her love with one of the members conquer all in the end?





	1. The Sale

It was a cloudy Saturday morning. My mom stormed into my room and smacked me with a magazine to wake me up. “Get up and pack your bags, [y/n],” she said as she lit a weed and stuck it in her mouth. “Mom, what is going on?” I asked, a tear rolling down my cheek. “I sold you for more weed money,” she grinned evilly. “Come meet your new owners.” She disappeared from my bedroom and so I got up and brushed my long, blonde scene hair with purple streaks and then put it in a messy bun. I quickly drew on thick emo eyeliner and put on skinny jeans, black converse, and a cropped sweat shirt. Then I packed a bag with all of my important things including my Panic! At The Disco CDs. They’re my favorite band EVER with their unique, emo trip-hop cabaret dance punk music (and if you don’t know who they are, then get tf out of here!!!) When I go downstairs, I walk into my living room, which is filled with weed smoke. My mom is sitting on the couch with four skinny twinks, and all of them are smoking weed. I gasp. It’s Brendon, Ryan, Spencer, and Jon. “There you are, [y/n],” mom sneered as she ate a weed brownie. “Meet your new owners, Panic! A The Disco. You’re their new sex slave.” Jon is wearing his signature flip flops, and Spencer looks like the mom friend, as usual. Ryan looks at me with red eyes and grins, “hey [y/n], do you want some cheez whiz?” He asks, while Brendon sips on a Capri sun in his tight fitting lavender hoodie. My legs shake as they tie me up and take me away to their limo, where Pete Wentz is waiting for us. It looks like this is my new life.


	2. The Emancipation Proclamation Is Rolling In Its Grave

In the limo, Pete blindfolded me and pushed me to the floor. The whole band put their feet on me because I was their slave now I guess. They started smoking the marijuana again and then turned up the radio. It was playing “I’m Not Okay” by My Chemical Romance. I don’t really like MCR but Gerard Way can like, totally get it. Anyway, then Ryan said “My Chemical Romance makes me dance” in a Weird British accent that sounded like one of those guys in that band the beetles. Huh. I didn’t know he was British. Suddenly, a foot smacked my face. It was Jon’s. “Rub my feet, slave,” he ordered. I rubbed his feet (they smelled bad) and began to cry. At that moment, I felt a warm hand on my cheek. “You may be our sex slave, [y/n], but to me you are so much more than that. You are the scene queen of my dreams.” It was SPENCER FUCKING SMITH!!!! He just confessed his feelings for me!!!! I blushed and I just knew that I looked like a ripe tomato on a summer’s day under my blindfold. Brendon pretended to vomit. “Spencer, you’re such a noob,” he sneered. “She’s not even a scene queen. What a poser.” Suddenly, there was a scuffle, and I heard someone punch someone else. “OW,” Brendon screamed. “It’s what you deserve, you gay emo Mormon,” Spencer replies coolly. The rest of the car ride, he held my hand tightly. I could already feel myself falling in love….


	3. It's Finger Lickin' Good

When the car stopped, someone removed my blindfold. It was Jon. He slapped my face with his flip flop and opened the door of the car. “Get tf out, [y/n],” he said. A tear rolled down my cheek and I did as he said. When I looked at where we were, I gasped in shock. It was a freakin’ MANSION! A huge fancy gate went around it and a solid gold fountain was in the front yard!! “This is the house that they will keep you in forever since you’re their slave,” Pete said. “They will live here and share you.” I gulped and nodded. They pushed me up to the front door and let me into the mansion. They walked ahead of me to a living room and all sat down on the brand new black leather couches. “Feed us grapes, slave,” Brendon ordered, then opened his mouth expectantly. I grabbed a bunch of grapes from the table and began to feed them. When I stuck one in Brendon’s mouth, he licked my finger...gross. Anyway, when I reached Spencer, I fed him a grape and he smile. Then, he pulled me into his lap!! OH MY GOD IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING?! “You’re so hot, [y/n]. You’re so much more than a slave to me. I think you’re my soulmate,” he said. I blushed as red as a freshly washed fire engine. “Ew,” Brendon said with a frown. “She’s not even that hot, Spencer. AND she’s a poser. She’s nothing compared to Audrey.” I noticed that Ryan looked a little annoyed and jealous at Brendon. Huh, I wonder why he would be upset. Maybe he’s a homo for Brendon. Suddenly, Pete stood up angrily. “Spencer, you must share her with the rest of the band. She is a slave. No feelings allowed.” My heart sunk. I already knew this would end in heartbreak….


	4. The Confession and the Proposal

Suddenly, Jon stood up and stood next to Pete with a glare in his eyes. “Pete is right. You have to share her. She is OUR sex slave, not just yours,” he said. “You don’t even like her, Jonathan!” Spencer huffed as he nuzzled my neck lovingly. “Why do you care?” Then, Jon stormed over and shoved me off of Spencer’s lap and grabbed Spencer by the neck. “I’m gonna beat you so hard you’re gonna cry like a little kid!” Jon screamed. “How DARE you assume my feelings about [y/n]?! I’m IN LOVE with her!!” I gasped and felt my stomach flutter with butterflies. Jon loves me too?! WHAT?! At that moment, I looked into his beautiful brown orbs is that looked like the mud after a rainstorm and sighed happily. He was SO handsome. In that moment, I forgot that he beat me with a flip flop. I am in love now. With two of my owners!!! Before I could confess to Jon, him and Spencer began punching each other. I screamed and began to cry warm tears that slid down my cheeks like rain drops on a wonder pain. “STOP PLEASE, DONT HURT EACH OTHER I CANT BARE TO SEE THE ONES I LOVE HURT!!” I yelled. Pete threw a grape at me in annoyance. “Shut up, slave.” When I looked over at Brendon and Ryan, Brendon was holding onto Ryan’s hand and crying into his shoulder in fear. Ha! I knew they were homos. They’re totally in love. Just like me and Spencer and Jon. Just as I looked back at the two boys fighting, Jon pushed Spencer into the glass table and it shattered into a million pieces. “AHHHH MY EYES!!” Spencer screamed. There was blood EVERYWHERE. I began to sob as I crawled over to Spencer. “It’s okay, baby. I love you. You will be okay,” I whispered as I stroked his greasy hair. “[y/n],” Spencer murmured back. “If I don’t make it, just know you’re the peanut butter to my jelly. I have a ring that I wanted to give to you. I wanted to marry you and be with u forever.” I gasped and clapped my hands over my mouth. My life with Spencer had just begun, and now it might end already....(to be continued....)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you (and I'm sorry) to anyone that reads my crack fic. Catch me on instagram @giivememaliice


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